From the Infamous Red Green..

Our prayers go out to all the pregnant women going into labour today. They have a real chance of their child being born on April Fool’s Day. Surprisingly nine months ago was July 1st. What are the chances that your reward for celebrating Independence day is a dependant? Unlikely but obviously not inconceivable.


A young couple were on their honeymoon. The husband was sitting in the bathroom on the edge of the bathtub saying to himself, “Now how can I tell my wife that I’ve got really smelly feet and that my socks absolutely stink? I’ve managed to keep it from her while we were dating, but she’s bound to find out sooner or later that my feet stink. Now how do I tell her?”

Meanwhile, the wife was sitting in the bed saying to herself, “Now how do I tell my husband that I’ve got really bad breath? I’ve been very lucky to keep it from him while we were courting, but as soon as he’s lived with me for a week, he’s bound to find out. Now how do I tell him gently?”

The husband finally plucks up enough courage to tell his wife and so he walks into the bedroom. He walks over to the bed, climbs over to his wife, puts his arm around her neck, moves his face very close to hers and says, “Darling, I’ve a confession to make.” And she says, “So have I, love.” To which he replies,

“Don’t tell me, you’ve eaten my socks!”

Joke Time

A doctor has 3 aging patients and he’s worried they’re developing Alzheimer’s. He doesn’t want to alarm them however and decides to administer a simple test to see if they are they’re minds are slipping.
He lucky enough that they’re all 3 waiting to see him and are sitting on a couch in the waiting room so he walks out there and asks the first man.
“What is 3 + 7?”
The man thinks about it for a while and then replies “247?”. The doctor shakes his head in despair and the moves to the next man and asks him
“What is 3+7?”
The second man thinks about it long and hard and then replies “Tuesday?”. Again the doctor shakes his head in dismay for his patients failing mind and turns to the last man
“What is 3+7?”
The third man however replies quick as a shot “10”. The doctor smiles, at least there’s hope for one of them “How did you come to that conclusion?” He asks him.
The man smiles and says “Easy. I just subtracted Tuesday from 247.”

Happy St. Patrick’s Day!

From the Red Green (

Two Irishmen were in London on a shopping trip when they saw a store with signs advertising Men’s Sportsjackets for 2 pounds (British money) and Men’s dress pants for 1 pound. One says to the other ‘At those prices we could buy a bunch, take them back to Ireland and make a fortune. Just don’t tell them we’re Irish or they’ll be on to us.’ So they go in and the clerk behind the counter says ‘Can I help you?’ and one of the men says ‘Yeah. Give us 50 sportsjackets and 100 pairs of pants.’ The clerk says ‘Are you guys Irish?’ And your man answers ‘Yes, how did you know?’ and the clerk says ‘Cause this is a dry cleaners.’

Happy St. Patrick’s Day. Many of my friends are Irish and quite a few more wish they were.

Miss Kentucky 2009 Visits Mary Carrico School

A couple of weeks ago Miss Kentucky 2009, Mallory Ervin, visited Mary Carrico School.  Her presentation and singing ability were very much appreciated by the kids, faculty, and staff.  Pictures will be posted soon on the school website ( ).  You can sign up there to have updates emailed to you when they are posted.

You can read Mallory’s blog here.

Mr. Clark, Fr. Pat Bittle, Mallory Ervin, Mallory's mother.